Irgendwo in Virginia...

Letzte Woche war ich in D.C. und da Freitag nach Thanksgiving -"Black Friday"- der Startschuss für Ami-Weihnachtseinkäufe ist, hab ich folgendes gedacht "american experience equals obligatory experience". Ich hatte noch nicht mal mein Käsetruthendl vom gobblegobble-Vortag verdaut, stand ich schon in irgendeiner Mall in Virginia herum. Warum Virginia? Keiner weiß das. Der wunderschöne Name dieser Mall war Potomac Mills. Nach fünf Stunden Shoppingmarathon fühlte ich mich wie ein Kaugummi der auf einem Basketballschuh klebt: dehydriert, grantig, pickig, mordeslustig,....


Warum erzähl ich euch das alles? Das ist meine Einleitung für folgende Begebenheiten, die sich in anderen Malls in den USA am Black Friday ereigneten: 1) die Zertampelung eines Wal-Mart-Mitarbeiters in NY und 2) zwei erschossene Teenager in einem Toys 'R' Us (!!!) in CA.

Ich habe immer schon gewußt, dass Shopping gefährlich ist. Drum bleibts zuhaus und machts eure eigenen Kleider. Ist sowieso viel besser, weil da kann frau gleichzeitig auch rauchen.


Happy late Thanksgiving from Miss Turkey!

ein halbwegs netter tag

schöne krawatte trug er gestern um 2am, der obama. ich bin noch immer ganz begeistert vom colour-scheming.

As seen in Soho, NYC

Apparently those Ed Hardy UGGs are so popular that they even fake them. My oh my!

News from the New World I

For my lovely new int'l readers, I will TRY to write a post in a funny language that includes words like "bamboozle", "flabbergasted" or "shenanigans" in its official vocabulary. A big cloud of European nosiness and arrogance is floating over the Atlantic and encircling me:

• Are they dumb? [No. They are much smarter than me. At least in this specific Disney-created place I live]
• Are they fat? [No. I live on the East Coast not in the f.... midwest]
• Are they supi-dupi-niceish? [Yes. To an extent that is unhealthy for my grumpy European soul]
• Is there music except for R&B or this? [Unfortunately not. I can't talk about that without poking my ears out with a stolen fork from the mensa]
• How can I get tickets for that fabulous underwear party in spring? [Strictly follow these orders: First, buy me lingerie; Second, finance my liposuction; Third, get over here!]
  

After answering your boring questions I can now move on to the really important stuff:

UGG Boots

I know, I know, I talked about it some other time. But until four weeks ago, I underestimated the sponging impact this particular footwear has on my brain (even worse than Crocs).

Many of you are asking themselves: What else can she possibly tell us about that topic? Hasn't everything been analyzed, critizised and dissected? No. I will tell you a little story. Its not better than Titanic I and II, but certainly more enjoyable than "The Fast and The Furious":

On a dreary, humid saturday I went to the Mall, bc. that's the thing you do here on a dreary, humid saturday. The Mall provides the two things you need to overcome dreariness and humidity: choco en masse and air conditioning. What I saw there wasn't ever meant to be seen by a sensitive human being like me:


But that's just the beginning. After the first shock settled, I drank sweet coffee, ate sweeter donuts with the sweetest filling and stumbled into a shoestore in which my fashionradar instantly detected this:

Was it just a dream caused by my massive intake of sugar? Was it all just a hallucination, a crack in the Matrix? Who does that? Who buys that? Why should you tattoo your shoes? Why?

On my search for Ed Hardy UGGs I found this UGG Hawaii - beauty: I just have to share it with you:

This story has no happy ending like Titanic II, in which Rose DeWitt Bukater owns a fashion imperium bought from Mugatu with the blue fancy disco-stone she found in her pocket and is divorced from Jack, who swam all the way to NY, bc. he was just kidding bc. he brought a thermo-mug with him so that he can warm his artsy hands in black decaff-tea, and he was a really good swimmer and I will play Kate Winslet, bc. obviously I look like her and we will all be very happy and live our glamorous/ tragic lives in the city of cities until a giant iceberg rams NYC bc. of global warming or whatever and then Rose (me) will fly to Alaska bc. they produce comfy clothes for cold weather and will live in Sarah Palin's house bc. it has a fireplace and I will have a cushion bunny or a cushion squirrel.

Since I am the humblestestest girl on the planet I have to admit that my winterboots unfortunately look like this. I wonder if they are still the inofficial uniform of the Austrian Green Party???

I'm feeling so bohemian like you

Das folgende passt nicht wirklich in die Rubrik Basse Couture, sondern eher in eine Rubrik, die extra erfunden werden müsste.

Vor langer Zeit war ich auf einem Konzert einer gewissen isländischen Band. Warum schreib ich hier darüber? Deswegen:

1) nordatlantische Origami-Bastelhaube

2) weißbeanzugte Herrenblaskapelle

3) umstandsbekleidetes Frauenstreichquartett

....und ich hab geglaubt ICH spinne!